Are you feeling re-entry anxiety as a highly sensitive person?

If you’re a highly sensitive person who is vaccinated, you might be feeling re-entry anxiety. The “summer of joy” might actually be feeling like a summer of mixed emotions.

Here are my experiences & some ideas that might be helpful!

In the last two & a half months, as I’ve tested the waters, my husband & I have met up with friends. We’ve gone to our first post-pandemic music concert. I also went clothes shopping for the first time in 16 months as well as to my favorite bookstore.

As a highly sensitive person, venturing out has felt decidedly mixed. There have been moments of delight, but it’s also felt messy.

After I got vaccinated, I felt a little bit frozen. But then, I took some small steps.

Meeting friends has been mostly fun. We’ve gathered at people’s homes where everyone (except the little children) was vaccinated. It felt delightful to try even little things, such as a new ice cream flavor, with others. And finally, we could take our masks off. But there were also moments of confusion.

At a couple of gatherings, a few people kept their masks on even though they were vaccinated. In the confusion, I had some moments where I wondered whether not putting my mask on was a BIG mistake. This was also the time when the Delta variant had just started emerging. Masks are no longer required at most places here in the San Francisco Bay Area. But I’d been wondering if this is again one of those hasty mandates — after all, we haven’t reached herd immunity yet.

The jazz concert was outside AND with socially distanced seating, so it felt fun. In the line to get in, people kept their masks on. The bookstore was different. I put on my mask inside. While some people were wearing masks, many weren’t. I felt conflicted. I felt like I couldn’t breathe, partly because of feeling anxious. I had planned to buy a little souvenir to mark this outing, but I ended up just leaving and not getting anything. Afterwards, in the shopping area, the noise felt LOUD & being around a lot of people felt very overstimulating.

So, it’s not felt exactly like a “summer of joy.” I think those of us who are vaccinated are nearing the end of the pandemic, but it’s not done yet. Here are some thoughts:

1. Focus on what’s in your control: My husband and I said no to a couple of large gatherings where we didn’t know everyone who was attending. We have chosen to be in smaller groups where we know that all the adults, at least, are vaccinated. As a highly sensitive person, I am super-cautious. If you’re like me & also have a history of trauma, assessing risk can feel hard. Everything feels risky when you feel triggered. I am trying to remember what I learned as I weighed the pros & cons of whether I wanted to get vaccinated about how, once upon a time, there was no word for risk in human languages. Life is risky. So, what I need to do is minimize the risk instead of feeling like I can avoid all risk & ending up feeling like a deer in the headlights.
2. Stand your ground if someone tries to push you: Everyone is doing what feels right to them. As highly sensitive people, we can sometimes confuse our (very helpful) natural caution with fear, especially if someone tries to shame us. But remember, our trait means we can see nuances that others might miss. So, trust your judgment. Make your own rules. Fellow sensitive, author Peg Cheng wrote this in one of her newsletters: “For me, even though I’m fully vaccinated, I’m still wearing my mask when shopping indoors and practicing social distancing at outdoor gatherings. I’m not planning on attending any indoor gatherings until the vaccination rate in the U.S. reaches 70% or more.”
3. Make a “Small Adventures Bucket List” for the summer: If you’re feeling overstimulated at the thought of big adventures and things you “should do” this summer, you’re not alone. I know many people who are feeling like this, including me. But a summer bucket list doesn’t have to be frighteningly ambitious. It can be about creating hope & thinking of small delights. As a highly sensitive person who is also a high-sensation-seeker, I crave variety. For me, one of the hard things about the pandemic has been this grayness that can seep in when day upon day is exactly the same. So, I’m thinking of my summer bucket list as a way to bring in some light. My list includes a visit to a museum to see a special exhibit, trying out new ice cream shops near me, and some more music. For you, it might be going to the beach, getting a special haircut, or something else. I find that it’s good to make a possibilities list that you can dip into. Making one really helped me navigate 2020.

If you’re a highly sensitive person, I hope you give yourself grace. Change is overstimulating. We can take baby steps and glide gently into the water. Once inside, it’s usually much easier.

I hope you take care of your sensitive self as you navigate this time!

With love,

Ritu

Ritu Kaushal is the author of The Empath’s Journey, a book for sensitives and empaths, and a Silver Medal awardee at the Rex Karamveer Chakra awards, co-presented by the United Nations in India.

Update: In the next day or so after I wrote this piece, many local counties here in the San Francisco Bay Area have started suggesting that even vaccinated people keep wearing masks in public places such as shops because cases are going up again because of the Delta variant. So, it turns out (again) that my decision to keep my mask on in that bookstore was the right thing to do.

I think this pandemic has underlined that I should really follow my own judgment. Even if it “looks silly,” I should keep doing what feels right to me.